pyroguysr's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MDRF - First few weekends 20040916 OK, so I�m going to try and put in some of my memories from RenFest� if nothing else than to give us all a break from politics� (listens to an eruption of elated, joyful exaltations)� It was sooo interesting watching the renfest in Maryland come slowly to life, but it was also sad to see much of the damage that was inflicted on the fair by mother nature. However, about a month before the Festival began, the grounds were soon brimming with the aural stimuli of circular saws, hammers, swearing and screams from power being turned on at the wrong time. The local woodchuck took it all in stride. Ah yes, the woodchuck. He waddled across our path on several occasions when we pulled into Gate D. He�d laboriously make his way from the woods to his hidey-hole beneath a booth and we�d just stop and stare. For you citified folk, a woodchuck looks quite a bit like a beaver without the flat tail� erm� a beaver looks a lot like a raccoon without the mask� erm� looks like a big, fluffball-furry rat without a tail... errrrm.. He�s a rodent, any way you look at it. He delighted us each visit with his unconcerned crossing of the road. We saw deer as well, the lovely, gracious creatures that they are (just keep their ticks away from me, please). Artemis was watching our progress and chuckling, I�m sure. We looked at our booth and found that Pat of Highland Woodworks next door, had indeed rebuilt his booth� this means he took away our right side wall (we are technically a �freestanding pavilion booth�) and we would have to do something to keep the water out and give us a place to put the dragons for display. Unfortunately, the dweeb that built our booth built it �square to the street� which puts it at an angle to the booths on either side of us. This caused some not-unconquerable, but frustrating problems. We got up walls, we tar-papered the walls to make them waterproof, found some �Oops� paint at Home Depot that was (YAY!) Our former landlady, good friend and favorite (well, one of my favorite) rose seller at faire, Tiger Torre (no, I do NOT know anyone without an animal or amusing name� My bosslady is Kat, our friends are Tiger, Redheaded Kat, Llama (Tiger�s boyfriend), Gelfling, Gumby, etc� anyway, Tiger looked at some old pallets we had been storing and figured out how to make shelving for us as well as use scrap plywood boxes to strengthen our loft floor. She did a fabulous job and we now have a 12 ft counterspace for display, an eating nook with benches and (huzzah!) a kitchen area where I can work my wonders! (Yes, ladies� I�m a damn good cook! Tiger�s glad I left her place so that she can finally lose some weight! LOL). Anyway, while Tiger was breaking apart the boxes, she managed to zonk herself in the head� not once, but twice� in the same place. It was quite amusing to watch her sit on the ground counting the little birdies. I mean, you could virtually see the stars and birdies flying about her head cartoon-style. Yes, we were concerned, made her sit for awhile and all, but we all had a good laugh over it. (You can find her brief account of this by going to Livejournal.com and looking up �DreamTigress�). Well, new roof upon the structure, new break area in the back, electrical outlets put in, grass blinds put up for privacy, propane stove, fridge, coffee maker, crock pot and utensils in place, we were now ready for business. First weekend was phenomenal! We usually sell 6 to 8 dragons the first weekend (along with an assortment of our smaller dragons � see our site at http://www.sleepingdragonsouth.com for ordering info) but this weekend, we sold over twice that many. It was a record weekend, for sure! First morning, I was walking back from my trip to the showers when I came across a young lass of somewhere between 12 and 16 with absolutely lovely red hair. Obviously and employee of the Faire (dressed in costume, inside before the fair opened) looking lost and confused. When I inquired whether I could help, she asked �where the White Hart� was. Now, this is a little odd, coming from such a young one, because the White Hart is our central pub. I asked what she�d be doing there and she replied �Trash Wench� (yes, it�s a real job description there). Well, I told her I definitely loved my wenches �trashy� (sexist pig, aren�t I?) and then took her to her destination. Evidently she had to know where the trash recepticals were. She was in charge of changing the trashbags out of the cans when they became full. I watched her all day making the circuit. Now, our business is on a small rise, so she had to walk up and down this rise on three different lanes. By 4 pm, she was dragging. Gumby and I had been giving people massages during the day so I offered her one, which she graciously accepted. The sweet lass tried to tip me for almost making her fall asleep. I assured her that I did it solely because I was the biggest perv at fair (shocked and amused her with that) but mainly because I fed off the positive energy that a good massage produces. Until last weekend, I thought I�d scared her away because I didn�t see her after that. Saw her on Sunday and she informed me that they rotate the various trash wenches and rogues so that they get to see different parts of the fair. She�ll be back for a massage in two more weekends. Massages� a few posts ago, I talked about giving massages to some of the other ladies at faire. They always go for Gumby. Sadly, they just don�t have their gay-dar turned on. Plus Gumby is fairly obvious about it. He�s just not a flamer. Hates the queens. I just think that queenies are funny. Gumby and I have a good routine going. He needed a pass to get into the fair, so Gumby and I are the sales staff. (He has a typical unpronounceable Polish last name� unpronounceable to all you non-Polocks out there, that is, but �Gumby� makes up the first two syllables, so Gumby he is!) We have a routine going now where he literally drags people into the booth (always want people in the booth because it attracts MORE people into the booth) and then I ask the ladies, "Do you know WHY you need a dragon? *I then take their hand* �Because there are rogues and thieves about! (If a husband or boyfriend is present, I then say:) See? You're being followed by one now! Thank GOD you're in the most honest shop in the shire! Because, If I weren't honest (begin kissing her hand) you'd probably be accosted (kiss again) by rogues and thieves (kiss) of all sorts (kiss) that would flirt with you unmercifully and (kiss again) would try and spirit you away from your loved ones (kiss) or flirt (kiss) with you right (kiss) in front of your (kiss) husband/boyfriend. But if you had a dragon (kiss) (now Gumby comes up and puts a dragon on her shoulder) Ummm... if you had a dragon... ummm... it would instill fear and dread into the hearts of these rogues and thieves and... ummm... nevermind!" At that point, I walk away, we get a good laugh and sometimes they even buy one. I had to handcuff this one guy (the dragons have tiny handcuffs) because he was in the booth kanoodling with his girlfriend without a license! Yes, he bought her one... a dragon, not a license. We let him go for that. We sell a LOT of dragons that way� chuckle. And damn, we have fun! He and I try to figure out ways to separate couples so that he can run off with the guy and I can do the same with the girl� Soooo much jailbait at faire� t�ain�t fair! Sooo much revealed flesh. But RenFest is definitely for guys that like big boobs. There be cleavage in abundance all over. Me? I just have to be one of the whacko minority that likes small boobies� and long legs� and a tight little ass� *sighs* Kat and I watched a friend of ours, Patrick Franz (http://www.taskmaskers.com/patrick.html and http://home.earthlink.net/~patfranz/resume.html), whom I met at Florida Ren Fest practicing on stage with two others that he performed with at the faire in North Carolina, the �Teatro di Pecorino Romano� which translates into �cheesy theater�. Since our break area has a nice, balcony view of the Globe Theatre Stage, we ate and watched them practice. They were doing �Taming of the Shrew� or some such. When they finished their first run-through, we clapped and I shouted �Ah, the folks at North Carolina Faire did it better!� earning me a couple universal hand signals and the girl then pulled up her sweatshirt almost to her boobs� �You don�t deserve to see the rest!� she quipped and dropped her garment. I love rennies! My health is good, other than occasional cramping in my feet � OK, it�s good, outside of getting a bee sting (a yellowjacket crawled up into my right sandal while I was standing - and when I turned to walk away, I squished him and he reflexively stung me). The next day I twisted my ankle from stepping on an exposed root after descending some stairs (no, April� same injury I mentioned before, not new ones) and finally; just bad knees (from playing too many intense racquetball games in my youth without warming up first). My ancient body is simply reacting to the weather changes due to the lovely Frances playing hell with barometric pressures. Thank the gods and goddesses for things like Ibuprophen and Naproxen! What�s really unusual is that I haven�t been going through internet withdrawal. It�s been far too busy. Yes, starting tomorrow, I�ll be gone for yet another 10 days. On Saturday, we had a visitor! Well, we�ve had many visitors, but the wife of the craft coordinator at the Louisianna Ren Fest came by to check us out. We were late getting our application in and were worried that we might not qualify. We got in!!! We will be in Hammond, Louisiana from the beginning of November to the middle of December, then I head back up to the Chicago area for Christmas and then down to Ft Lauderdale for the Florida RenFest. Mary Claude and her family stops by on a regular basis. New baby there: Ryan. Savannah and Amber are still total cuties. Amber loves to have me pick her up for �jumping� and �swinging� but Savannah is being shy this year� as is apropos for a 2 yr old. Kat is Ryan�s godmommy, so she loves holding the kid. My car windows have gone funny on me. The drivers side window decided back in January that it would work when I was in Texas with my brother, Mike. Then, about two months ago, it decided it DIDN�T want to work. Then the passenger side began slowing in their trek up and down the window guides and eventually stopped going UP. I�ll be working on that this next week. Took it to the dealer and they quoted me $700 per window because the armature that the window hooks onto is NOT a separate component from the motor. Instead, I�m gonna visit the junk yard nearby and see what I can get, then tear open my doors and begin replacing things. Maybe I'll buy some new speakers as well. Have to eventually purchase a hitch as we�re gonna need my car to pull our equipment trailer down to New Orleans at the end of October and then down to Florida from there. Mailed off packages to Wenchie, Sneech and Linz today� stuff that we got at Otakon. We had a LOT of people say they saw us at Otakon! That was always good to hear. I�ll be sending off my son�s package, as well as Mandy�s, shortly. I want to make copies of the FLCL DVD�s I bought my son for his birthday (twangs his guitar and sings �Ride On Shooting Star!�) I guess I could wrap this up with some incongruities I see at fair: Looking up from the back of the herbal tea and organic drinks booth at fair and you will see, in the second story window, several bottles of a very nice cognac and whiskies� and in the back of a place that serves �natural foods� you find� vending machines for junk food. Hey, just because you work there doesn�t mean you have to EAT the crap! LOL 6:37 p.m. - 2004-09-16 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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