pyroguysr's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Things that go boom and hum I'm back, my batteries are recharged and I'm actually (TRULY)going to be a grandfather this time! Slogged through over 180 entries on LiveJournal (and will cull several "friends" that write about stuff I've not the least bit of interest in) and read over 80 entries here. We ended up shooting 9 shows in 12 days, which is a killer schedule. Imagine moving the contents of your home in and out of a truck 9 times in 12 days with five guys and you get the scope. But the fireworks shows were beautiful. We shot shows in Dyer, Indiana; Palos Heights, Country Club Hills, Oak Brook, Westmont, Blue Island and Park Ridge Illinois, Ft Atkinson (Lake Koshkonong)and Port Washington Wisconsin among others. Overall, it was a crazy time, but it was also fun to see old friends (including one back from military service in Iraq) and make a couple new ones. I was off the net for most of that time. Funny thing was that I didn't really miss it. I don't know if it was the fact that I was too busy to do so or that I'm less and less addicted to it. Either way, I'm not worried, other than the fact that I'm becoming introverted again. The drive up was relatively uneventful except for the fact that it rained and my car no longer has a/c. But it was a beautiful drive up through the Virginia Shennandoah Mountains. It's beautiful country, as is West Virginia. I find it amusing that I crossed the Kewahnah River three times to get around Charleston. My mom is another matter entirely. I've spent the last three years avoiding trying to think about the fact that she's slowly falling into dementia. I'm resigning to the fact that I need to go back there and take care of things, being the eldest. I want to sigh and avoid it, but other things are tugging me back there, one (of course) being the fireworks and the other being my son and daughter-in-law who are about to make me a grandfather. The D-I-L waited until after the first trimester this time to make the announcement, so it looks like the little bean will stick this time. I can't be that far away from them for a grandchild. So I am making plans to head back there. Yes, I did manage to get divorced while being back there. She says it's to "protect her legal interests in the house, should I get sued." What she's been subtly telling me is that she found a guy she wants to date and didn't feel comfortable doing so while merely being separated. I understand both these lines of thought. I'm also not as hurt as I could be by them. My feelings have pretty much been "null" as of late, so this all may not be a bad thing. She had me over and I stayed the night on the couch at the old house. When the ex fell asleep, I went out to the back deck like I used to and lit some candles for meditation. I miss doing that there. So much energy comes up from that site, right through the soles of my feet and filling me with a tingling each time I'm there. Maybe it's that I identify with the five 120 yr old oak trees in the yard, maybe it's that there have been so many memories built there... all I know is that it recharged me and I am now at peace with a lot of things. As for my mom, well, I mean, just about everyone in my family has asked me, in one way or another, to come back and help out. I'm thinking I probably should. It would give me more time with my son and with friends that also love me. I'll miss this life here though... the Ren Fairs and the Conventions... Had to come rushing home for several reasons... one being a doctors appointment that I'd missed. It was a grueling drive back. I had to stop several times because of the heat and stand in an air conditioned store just to cool down... but I made the trip back in a mere 20 hours. I'm insane, I know. I've been downloading music from the 60's and 70's now, went out with Desiree last night to talk about her starting up another group in either Chapel Hill or Durham. I like Des. While I do have a bit of a crush on her, I like her more as a friend. We can talk about almost anything. I guess we're an outlet for each other. Another thing that happened was that an old (girl)friend asked me to call her daughter. I've not really talked to Mandee since she was 11 (10 years ago) and only briefly got to talk to her at her graduation party a few years back. Now, I wasn't sure what I was going to chat with her about, but I promised her mother I'd call her. Figuring I'd only talk about 20 minutes, I called quiet late. Mandee and I talked for over 3 hours! We caught up on all sorts of thing. I like her. She's witty, extremely intelligent (I'm "Pinky" to her "Brain") and she's fun. I think we hit it off pretty well. So, anyway, I'm back. I've work to do on my novel and then I have to begin crafting an inquiry letter. I will have stuff going out later this year. No, you don't understand.... I will have a manuscript out to publishers. I WILL! 10:38 p.m. - 2006-07-15 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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